Do you ever feel that you have more potential that you are realising? Perhaps it seems as if your plans never come to fruition – or you sabotage your own success. Perhaps you lack confidence in your own abilities and doubt your capacity for success. Do you tend to procrastinate or find your great ideas never see the light of day? Then it may well be that you are creating your own psychological barriers to success?
Many of us carry around limiting beliefs and negative habits which hinder our success. These beliefs and behaviours are sometimes so well developed that we don’t even realise they are there – and when we do, we don’t have the skills or tools to overcome them. Typical barriers to success include: Fear of success and/or fear of failure, low self-esteem, negative thinking, reluctance to seek help, negative past experiences that continue to create emotional blocks, difficulties relating to others, depression, self-doubt and/or lack of self-belief.
However we pay the price for these negative thoughts and self-doubts.
Bring to mind something that you’ve been wanting to do – and write it down on a sheet of paper. Now think of all of the reasons that stop you from doing this – and write these down. Next review the list and cross off those that are simply not real or true (it may be helpful to enlist the help of a friend here).
Now look at the negative beliefs on your list that can be substituted with something more positive. The brain cannot hold two contradictory beliefs simultaneously – thus try replacing a negative belief (e.g. I could never go to college) with a more positive one (I have the ability to go to college). Better still, write the positive affirmation in the present tense as if it is already happening (I am studying in College and loving every minute of it). Write down your affirmations and put them on your desk or bathroom mirror, repeating them as often as possible. Notice when self-doubts crop up.
When self-doubts and limiting beliefs sneak in – do a reality check and ask yourself ‘Is there a rational reason to believe them?’ If so, what can you do to change this? Is there something practical we can do to? Sometimes our doubts and negative self-beliefs are rooted in earlier life experiences or childhood traumas. If this is the case, perhaps you could seek the help of a counsellor or coach to overcome these.
Next week we will continue to look at our own personal Psychological Barriers to Success and discuss ways in which these can be overcome.
SouthWest Counselling Centre Killarney provides affordable professional counselling to children, adolescents adults and couples – both at its Killarney Centre (Lewis Road) and at Kenmare Family Centre. info@southwestcounselling.ie.
Kerry LifeLine provides FREE counselling and support to anyone feeling suicidal or bereaved through suicide. info@kerrylifeline.com
To make an appointment call 064 6636416/064 66364100
SouthWest Counselling Centre is a not-for-profit organization. All funds raised through fundraising go directly to service provision